A.I.: Artificial Intelligence (2001)

Spoilers. Just sayin’.
I remember so well when this movie was released.  I was 10-years-old, and I wanted sooo badly to see it – but due to its PG-13 rating my mom wouldn’t let me.  I got over it.  I’m glad, now, that I didn’t see it then because when I finally was able to, I could appreciate it.  At 10-years I already loved movies and knew all about Steven Spielberg; E.T., Close Encounters, Jaws, & Jurrasic Park were favorites from my childhood.  I did not, however, know who Stanley Kubrick was (pretty sure that name came along when I was 12 or 13).  This began as Kubrick’s project and you can see his prints all over it.
Sometime in the future, where the world is starting to freeze over and couples must obtain a license to have children, technology has advanced so much that man can create life.  Artificial intelligence (robots) are hardly distinguishable from human beings.  Scientist Allan Hobby (William Hurt) wants to take it a step further: What if we could create a Robot that could love.  Not physical lust but love like a child would care for his mother. What if?
And so David was created (Haley Joel Osment).  Monica (Frances O’Connor) and Henry (Sam Robards) Swintons – whose child is being held in cryostasis until a cure is found for his disease – decide to test out this new product. (Yeah, I totally stole that from IMDb.  But I didn’t really know what the kid’s problem was.  So sue me).  Henry brings him home and Monica is initially furious.  No “mecha” could replace her own physical child.  Trial period ensues.  Should they choose to keep David, they must perform an irreversable imprint ritual.  Monica spends time with David and they begin to bond.  She decides to do the imprint thing (sadly, this now makes me think of Breaking Dawn…) and David is now in for good.  The transformation is instant – Monica is now Mommy and David wants nothing but to make her happy.
Problems arrive when their “real” son, Martin (Jake Thomas) recovers and comes home.  Suddenly David’s got competition.  Suddenly “Daddy” has changed his mind about the entire ordeal.  Suddenly David is getting in trouble and doesn’t know how to get mommy’s love anymore.  David cuts a lock off Monica’s hair to gain her love but is falsely accused of sinister motives.  Things get worse when he’s found holding Martin at the bottom of a pool… but only because he was frightened seconds earlier and wanted protection.  Monica (sob sob sob) can’t take it anymore, David’s gotta go.
So what does she do?  She drops him in the middle of the woods with nothing but a smart Teddy, some money, and a dismal parting message: “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about the world.”  WTF?  He may be artificial, but he’s still a kid.  All he can figure is that his mother must not love him because he isn’t real like Martin.  He decides to search for the Blue Fairy so that he can become a real boy like Pinnochio.
Part two, the story takes a turn and we are introduced to (though we don’t thoroughly explore) this “world.”  Mecha exist everywhere, but humans resent their presence.  “Flesh Fairs” are held to destroy and publicly ridicule mecha, led by Lord Johnson-Johnson (Brendan Gleeson).  Human nature hasn’t degraded far enough for them to ridicule an 8-year-old boy, however, when David is under display.
David still searches for the Blue Fairy, still accompanied by Teddy and newly accompanied by Gigolo Joe – Hey Joe what do you know? (Jude Law).  He is led (guided by Dr. Know (Robin Williams)) to an underwater Manhattan.
The end to this film is an end for discussion, and I must admit I have a few issues with it myself.
David is reunited with Dr. Hobby, creator.  We learn that David is the new frontier.  Soon he will be available to anyone who wants a child that can love.  Suddeny, though, David leaves.  Hey Joe what do you know is taken by the police.  David finds the remains of a Pinnochio exhibit on an underwater Coney Island.  David and Teddy stay in the helicopter thing for, wait for it, two thousand years praying to the Blue Fairy.  After those two thousand years – the Mecha of the future and some sort of real Blue Fairy (Meryl Streep) find David and are able to reunite him with his mother for a day only.  The film ends after a perfect day spent with Monica.
I’m not in the habit of writing an entire synopsis for a simple review, that’s not my thing.  But I’ve been thinking about this movie so much that it helps me to sort it all out.  I’m even having difficulty throwing in sarcastic comments, made-up words and dumb jokes I’m thinking about this so hard.  Allow me to interject now with a big WTfreakingF???  Like, seriously.  I don’t even know what to think.  But now that I’ve gotten this out of my system, thanks for listening to that really boring summary instead of our usual review format.  I feel much better now, folks.  Anyway, there are the little things that bug me… for example though I liked Jude Law’s character I found the sexual innuendos unnecessary.  It gave an interesting perspective to David’s unique ability to truly love, but in the end it contributed nothing.  I also wonder what the point is of owning a perpetual 8-year-old.  But those are small things.
Many complain about the end.  Many are convinced that Spielberg took this film a completely different direction than was the intention of Kubrick.  (Spielberg has been quoted to say that this is false, Kubrick’s intentions were met in the finished product.  Apparently).  Granted, I had a WTF moment myself and it took two viewings to really place it but seeing as mecha cannot become human, this is sci-fi not fantasy, I found the ending appropriate.  David found closure.  His wish essentially came true.  He was able to spend a perfect day with his mother and do the things he wanted to.  Who knows what his future holds – he is one of a kind, now.
My issue concerns the almost-end.  Apparently he was led to Manhattan as part of a plan.  Apparently he was special.  Apparently the fellow scientists (including Miles from Lost!)  were dying to meet him.  He was made in the image of Doctor Hobby’s son for crying out loud!  Yet…. nothing else happens?  David… gets left?  Did they search for him?  What would have happened next?  Now do their Davids and Darlenes get shipped to the world?  We are led to this moment and nothing happens.  That threw me.  And really bothers me.
My admiration for this film outweighs my contempt for its faults, and although I was thrown by the ending it adds to my appreciation.  Though I love Spielberg and Sci-Fi always – the selling point is Haley Joel Osment.  He may be the very best child actor to have passed through cinema, and yeah I’m being serious.  It’s not easy for an adult to correctly display artificial emotions, yet he does it without a single misstep.  His eyes tell the story.  His performance could not be duplicated.  If anything, the film is worth it for him.
It is unique.  It is fascinating.  I was invested every second.  As with all works of art, it’s now left to interpretation, so do what you will with the ending.  I, however, highly recommend the film.  It must have been worth it if I’m already eager to watch it again. :) 8/10
On a side note – I want a Teddy.  That’s my kind of companion!

Toy Story 2 (1999)

Just when we thought Toy Story was the best thing there was – Toy Story 2 comes out.  Pixar’s third effort is out to prove that these flicks are way more than just kids’ movies because seriously this movie has got more emotional baggage than Terms of Endearment. Okay, not really, but you get the picture.  Toy Story 2 opens with awesome exchange between Buzz Lightyear (Tim Allen) and his nemesis Emperor Zurg (Andrew Stanton) complete with Star Wars references.  After Buzz gets his top blown off, we’re initially scared out of our pants.  Luckily, he’s actually in his very own video game – and other than Rex’s (Wallace Shawn) short arms things are well in the world of Andy’s bedroom.  Our favorite Woody (Tom Hanks) is off to Cowboy Camp, Mr. Potato Head (Don Rickles) is lovin’ married life, and Buzz is still Mr. Popular.  That is, until Woody gets his arm torn and then he gets sold in a yard sale to a crazy chicken man only to find out he’s worth bank and then be sold to a museum in Tokyo… Okay I just got way ahead of myself on that one.
Anyway.  Throughout this whole climax, we find out that Woody isn’t just Andy’s favorite toy.  He’s a rare Sheriff Woody doll, with a round-up gang and his face on a yo-yo to boot.  Woody doesn’t know what to think of his gang at first, but soon bonds with Jessie the cowgirl (Joan Cusack), The Prospector aka Stinky Pete (Kelsey Grammer) and Bulls Eye (a real, live horse I’m sure).  Meanwhile, his friends from Andy’s room (Buzz, Rex, Slink, Tater head, and Hamm) are doing everything in their power to rescue him – even crossing the street without adult supervision.  In the end, it’ll come down to whatever Woody decides is more important, being loved by a child or being preserved in top-notch condition forever and ever while being pampered with cocktails and other special treatment along the way.
Toy Story 2 is driven by emotion.  One of the most moving and sad moments occurs when Jessie tells her tale of being forgotten by her owner, Emily. Man is that heavy stuff.  First, Woody’s havin’ creepy nightmares about his being left behind by Andy, then Jessie REALLY gets left behind by Emily, then Buzz gets rejected by Woody … it really makes you think doesn’t it?  The boundary between toys and humans thins considerably as we find our eyes watering at the realization that we, too, could be forgotten one day.  Morbid.
But this movie is far from depressing – it’s hilarious!  Witty one-liners and Buzz Lightyear imposters and married spuds and tour guide Barbies.  Oh, and more Star Wars homages. That’s when you KNOW a movie is good.  Just kidding.  But not really.
On a last note, the animation is incredible.  Those cheeto puffs look as edible as any I’ve ever eaten – I am absolutely amazed at the detail.  If you haven’t seen it yet, you’ve prob been living under a rock in Ghana, but see it.  You won’t regret it. 10/10

films that defined us

I was asked by Marc from the awesome blog Go, See, Talk! to participate in this awesome blogathon: Films That Defined Us.  Man, these are the best things to think about.  Everyone remembers the movies that touched us as kids, movies that we could watch all day long on a Saturday, movies that we’ll always consider special.  My list plays directly off the word define.  I tried to choose movies that I not only enjoyed but movies that shaped the person I am today – or influenced future movie viewing habits.
8 genres, 8 movies.  Ready, set, go!
8. Drama: Apollo 13 (1995)This is one of the first “adult” movies I remember watching and I thought I was soooo cool to get to see it (I was probably 6 or 7…)  Being already fascinated with space travel (thanks to Star Wars) this raised it a whole ‘nother level – this baby actually happened, it’s history.  Still a favorite movie and a must-see – annnd I still think it should have won Best Picture… (sorry Braveheart).
7. Musical: Thoroughly Modern Millie (1967)
I grew up watching and loving musicals but this was my favorite.  Somewhere between tapping the Tapioca and quirky, kidnappin’, Chinese women I became obsessed with this nonsense.  Today, while it’s since been replaced by West Side Story as my fav, I still know every lyric, I still love Mary Tyler Moore and John Gavin, and it still makes me want to dance.  I would cite it as the biggest influence in my musical-loving life.
6. Animation: Mulan (1998)
I dare say that this movie “defines” me more than just about any other movie because I used to pretend to beMulan. It also inspired the martial arts side in me to come alive.  I now have a black belt and that passion began sometime while watching this Disney chick kick Hun-trash.  In the animation genre, I’d have to say that there are many that surpass (yeah, Pixar happened), but it’s still a lot of fun.
5. Thriller. Kind of: Rear Window (1954)
And so begins my Hitchcock obsession.  And a love for Jimmy Stewart.  I can’t even remember how old I was when I first saw it but it always stuck with me (and made me never want to watch Perry Mason…)
4. Adventure/Comedy/Romance/Everything: The Princess Bride (1987)
Man, what genre does this film fall under anyway?  It’s got “fencing, fighting, torture, revenge, giants, monsters, chases, escapes, true love, miracles…” Anywho, this is where I learned to quote movies.  “Anybody want a peanut?” and “Have fun storming the castle!” I used on a daily basis.  It also gave birth to an undying admiration for sword fighting.  Whatever genre it may fall under, it’s made for every kid, teen, and adult.
3. Sports: Hoosiers (1986)
Favorite sports movie of all time.  Bball is also my favorite sport and every time I watched this, I’d want to get out and play.  So you could say it helped improve my ballin’ skills.  Basketball is still very important to me.  As for its genre, it’s simply the best out there.
2. Classic: On the Waterfront (1954)
This one came later on (as in just a few years ago), but has nonetheless made its mark on my life.  This is where I really got the whole classic-movie-gig.  Though I already wanted to marry Cary Grant, this movie made me want to watch absolutely anything made before 1960.  It has defined me by helping me discover the thrill of classics.
1: Sci-fi/Adventure: Star Wars (A New Hope) (1977)
There it is.  The king.  I must have watched the original trilogy of SW over 100 times in my childhood.  I used to pretend to fight with lightsabers and play with my brother’s toy Millenium Falcon.  I had no idea  a movie could be so wonderful and thought there was nothing parallel.  My perfect movie.
Thoughts?

Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones (2002)

Attack of the Clones picks up ten years after little Ani Skywalker became Obi Wan Kenobi’s padawan learner.  The galaxy is on the brink of a civil war.  There are still Sith lords on the loose, and star systems are threatening to leave the Republic.  After multiple assassination attempts on Senator Padme Amidala (Natalie Portman), team Anakin (who’s no longer a baby-faced kid but an angsty nineteen/twenty something year old – played, well, pretty awfully by Hayden Christensen) is on Padme’s detail and Team Obi Wan (Ewan McGregor) leaves to investigate the who and what behind the assassination attempts.
Anything else?  Oh yeah.  Anakin and Padme fall in love.
While Attack of the Clones is leagues ahead of Phantom Menace in most respects… it still has two issues.  Just two – no big deal, right?  Wrong.  Those two things are sort of, like, central to the entire prequel trilogy.  They’re really unfortunate things to mess up on:
Number 1?  Yeah.  Anakin.   I’m not sure who’s more to blame, Christensen or George Lucas.  Hayden aside, what kind of character do we have?  Some idiot who complains all the freaking time about things like sand and life being super unfair.  Unfair?  This is coming from a nobody who was literally brought out of the boonies to become an incredible somebody – all out of the goodness of a Jedi master’s heart.  Man, I wish he’d shut up.  I’ll give him some things, though.  I like him all right when he’s with Obi Wan.  His recklessness and cocky attitude are fitting and keep Obi in check.  I really like their relationship, actually.  (“If you spent as much time practicing your saber techniques as you did your wit you would rival Master Yoda as a swordsman.” “I thought I already did.” “Only in your mind, my very young apprentice.”)
Number 2?  That freakin’ romance.  Natalie Portman’s much better this time around, but I just couldn’t buy their relationship.  Zero chemistry.  And really, why the heck is she attracted to someone who’s so whiny and unlikeable anyway?  Right, I too get turned on by sandpeople slaughterin’ macho men… ?  She started out fine with her initial older sister-like disdain for Ani and the I-think-you-should-shut-up-kid look, but the next minute they’re frollicking in the grass.  Sheesh, man.  It’s all pretty dismissable, except the whole grab-a-quick-kiss-on-a-rhino’s-back thing. Now that really got me laughing.  Could you get any cheesier?
With those major bits out of the way let’s get to the good bits.
Love the Jar-Jar shut-down.  But did anyone else notice that he was the one who granted Palpatine emergency powers?  So he’s responsible for every… nevermind.  Limited Jar Jar is good.
This installment is full of “aha!” moments.  Such as…
  • Jango Fett is a stormtrooper.  Sorta.  At least, they all look like him.  Like father, like son – he too was a bounty hunter.
  • With that – stormtroopers used to be good!  The clones were on our side in The Clone Wars.
  • Owen and Beru get screen time.  Owen’s actually Anakin’s step brother through Shmi’s second (first?) marriage.  Great choices, they look like their future selves.
  • Death star plans? Yessss.
Being the SW nerd that I am, I dig any freaking second on other star systems.  Kamino, Coruscant, not s’much Tattooine, Geonosis, and Naboo (I’d live there!)  The galaxy-expansion is very exciting.  I’m also totally into the political intrigue that went behind the birth of the Empire.
I’m not gonna lie, I get a major adrenaline rush when all those jedi rush out with their lightsabers on Geonosis.  It’s the first time there has been more than three lightsabers present at any given time in the franchise, so that was freaking legit.  This is the golden age of the jedis – to see them in action is such a thrill.  It’s also pretty great to see Mace Windu (Sam’s the man L. Jackson) kick major trash.  The Yoda (Frank Oz) battle is pretty sweet too, what a mean green fighting machine.  Frankly though, I prefer his throw things at you with eyes closed approach better than lightsaberin’ it up.  He flips around so much, you’d think he could just chop his legs off being so small but whatev.  Yoda rocks no matter what.
Count Dooku (Christopher Lee) is pretty sweet, though Maul still rocks the ceiling off.  My personal favorite aspect of AotC is Ewan McGregor as Obi Wan.  What a dog, he’s jumping out of buildings, getting in more bar fights, and talking back to his apprentice.  A great character, he is.
The redeeming factors outweigh the major flaws.  This is a much better movie than Episode I, but I think it’s weaker regarding the bigger picture.  After watching Revenge of the Sith where Hayden isn’t quite so bad, if only he could’ve just been likeable in this one… it would have saved the entire trilogy.  If Anakin and Padme had been believable together in this one, Ep. III would make much more sense.  It’s the weakest link; it doesn’t tie the two together like it should.  Thank goodness for kick-A lightsaber battles. 7/10

Quiz Show (1994)

It’s the late ’50s and geeky Herb Stempel (John Turturro) is on a winning streak with popular quiz showTwenty One.  Quick rundown of the show:  There are two contestants, one returning champ and one unlucky opponent.  They meet briefly with host Jack Barry (Christopher McDonald) at the start of the show before being separated and sent to their own hot ‘n’ sweaty isolation booths.  During play neither contestant can hear the opposition nor see their total points.  Barry presents the category for the round and each player takes turns answering questions from that category.  They may choose any point value from 1-11 and the first to twenty-one wins.  It should also be noted that the questions, when not in play, are kept in a secure bank vault.
But when ol’ Herbie stops bringing in the ratings, producers Dan Enright (David Paymer) and Albert Freedman (Hank Azaria) search for a new champ.  New contestant: earnest lookin’ college professor Charles Van Doren (Ralph Fiennes) son of Mark Van Doren (Paul Scofield) a renowned poet.  To ensure the smooth departure of Herbert and the big arrival of Charles, they ask Herbert to take a dive.  Not just take a dive, but fail miserably and embarrassingly.  Q: Academy Award winner for Best Picture 1955? A: On the Waterfront, Herb must reply – even though Marty is one of his favorite movies.  Why would asking Herbert to lose of his own accord even be applicable?  Oh wait, turns out those questions aren’t quite so sacred as the public thought and turns out that Stempel has been fed the answers all along.  He reluctantly agrees to bow out, but only if Enright will extend further television opportunities outside of the quiz show.
They try to offer the same gig to Charles… but this too-good-to-be-true hero has a conscience, darn it.  However, regardless to Charles’ initial aversion to cheating, they plant a question that Charles already knew the answer to.  And he knew that they knew that he knew the answer.  It’s a lot harder to exercise integrity on National TV, eh?  He answers correctly.  The new champ has been named and Charlie reaches stardom in the blink of an eye.  The public adore this squeaky clean, ideal, all-American man.  Herb disappears into the void of obscurity.  Somewhere between wishing for a new car, wanting to getting his teeth capped (he probablyshould have taken care of that one), and hoping that Enright would hold tight on his end of the deal he should have realized it wasn’t the greatest idea to bet his money away.  Complaining to your former boss will only get you so far.  No one cares about Herb Stempel anyway, he’s old news.
Then Dick Goodwin (Rob Morrow), a young but talented lawyer, comes along.  After hearing rumors of rigged game shows, he opens an investigation of Twenty One.  He meets with Stempel, he meets with NBC producers, he develops a friendship with Van Doren.  Turns out he’s stumbled on dynamite.
I totally dig this kind of stuff.  I feel about this the same way that I feel about Shattered Glass. It doesn’t just document an interesting scandal, it captures a time in history.  “It’s television.”  The controversy was certainly enough to keep our attention but director Robert Redford took it a step further and showed us a life.  It delves into Van Doren’s relationship with his father (ahh, Paul Scofield!) as well as interesting points on Jew/Gentile winners and losers.
Quiz Show was nominated for 4 Academy Awards including Best Picture and Best Director.  Here are what make it the bee’s knees: The acting is spectacular.  Hank Azaria and David Paymer are my two particular favorite performances but the selling ticket is Paul Scofield, who was nominated for Best Supporting Actor.  Ralph Fiennes should also be credited who managed to embody this character with style, likeability, and emotional depth.  Also, have you ever seen so many cameos?  Martin Scorcese?  Barry Levinson?  Douglas McGrath?  Even if the acting wasn’t solid, this sharp script could make Megan Fox seem almost credible.  Lastly, you can almost feel Robert Redford walking through the set.  He leaves his mark in the most positive light.  It’s a film that wouldn’t be the same without his magical touch.  The only negative thing I have to say is perhaps geared towards its long running time.
It’s thought provoking and intelligent – a must see. 9/10

The Lodger: A Story of the London Fog (1927)

Much like Blackmail, The Lodger looks and feels like a Hitchcock piece.  But The Lodger is even better.
It’s about a series of murders committed by the neighborhood’s Jack the Ripper type killer called “the Avenger.”  Seven golden-haired girls have already bit the dust and the culprit is still at large.  Then, at the Bunting residence, a new tenant (Ivor Novello) arrives interested in their room for rent.  He’s very reserved, pays in advance, and is oddly frightened by golden-haired lady pictures  donning the walls.  Then, after first glance of golden-haired daughter Daisy (June Tripp… though apparently her screen name is simply “June”), this duo are instantly attracted to one another.  (There is no short supply of golden-haired chicks floating around, hence the periodic “To-night ‘Golden Curls’” memo – where, in fact, the blondies attempt to hide their golden locks for fear of being labeled as potential victims).
Daisy’s policeman beau Joe (Malcolm Keen) is assigned to the Avenger case and is definitely into Daisy’s new interest.  One evening Mrs. Bunting (Marie Ault) catches the lodger sneaking out in the middle of the night and the next morning another dead golden-haired girl is discovered – around the corner from their home.  Could the Avenger be the lodger? (he does have a name, by the way – Jonathan)
The Lodger is an excellent silent ranking in my top 3 early Hitchcocks.  It’s suspensful and excellently sets an apprehensive mood.  Our leading lady is an interesting character though at times a little much.  The other actors are quite good, particularly Ivor Novello.  The musical score (though better than Champagne) felt like the same three themes on repeat, but at least it was applicable.  Where history is concerned, this is the true molding for the master’s future career as it is his earliest to have survived in its entirety.  All in all a really great piece of work. 8/10

Number Seventeen (1932)

Subtitles, guys… subtitles… Any admirable qualities are washed away in a wave of ambiguity.  We’re talking a BIG hole when you can hardly understand the dialogue.  Or maybe I’m just stupid.
Number Seventeen, based on a stage play by J. Jefferson Farjeon (thanks Wikipedia), takes place in an old house by a railway.  Detective Gilbert (John Stuart) is looking for a valuable necklace that was robbed.  While searching the old house, he and an old man named Ben (Leon M. Lion) stumble upon a dead body.  Throughout the film more characters show up including a woman who falls through the roof named Nora (Anne Grey), and the actual gang of thieves responsible for the robbery, Mr. and Mrs. deaf-and-dumb Ackroyd (Henry Caine and Ann Casson) and a third.  The dead body soon disappears, guns are being pulled at everyone, people keep getting locked into different rooms, the sought-after necklace is recovered, and everybody ends up on a train.
First of all, I would love to see a remake.  It’s an idea with great potential, and although this production is not gold-star worthy I was really interested.  Second, Leon Lion is really funny to watch on screen – he’s that bad.  Can one man move their face that many different ways in the space of twenty seconds?  Yes, he can.  Third, the sound and music meshes together much better than Champagne (aka it was actually intentional).  Fourth, the mood and pace are quite good.
Hitchcock cites this film in his famous interview with Truffaut as being a disaster.  I beg to differ, Champagne was a disaster.  Number Seventeen is unrealized potential.  I enjoyed it, and there’s definitely some solid material to build upon.  5/10

12 Angry Men (1957)

Basic murder case.  Troubled kid.  Murdered father.  Easy math.  He was labeled guilty before the trial ever started.  That’s what the jury thought also, until Juror #8 (Henry Fonda) voiced his opinion.  “I’m not sure,” he said.  “Well, there were eleven votes for guilty. It’s not easy to raise my hand and send a boy off to die without talking about it first.”
A man’s life is important enough for some time and consideration.  It’s not that Juror #8 is some saint or savior but just that he has the humanity to take his role seriously.  “I’m not saying he’s innocent, I’m saying it’s possible.”  From the very beginning there was apathy.  Take the judge: “Premeditated murder is the most serious charge tried in our criminal courts… …The death sentence is mandatory in this case…”  He speaks with a yawn in his throat.  I remember thinking, is this for real?  Then, when #8 suggests, “let’s talk about it, give him an hour at least.”  “Sure, we can do that.” everybody says, and they begin “stalling” time so they can at least say they considered “for an hour.”  Don’t they get it?
My favorite is Juror #4 (E.G. Marshall).  Unlike most of the others, he intelligently processed the details and carefully thought through the situation to come to the conclusion that he was guilty.  He wasn’t motivated by baseball tickets, animosity, prejudice, indifference, fatigue, or a stuffy room.  He calmly presented his reasons and argued his point in a civilized manner.
Then, of course, there’s Juror #3 (Lee J.  Cobb).  He’s the “Yeah, what he said!” man of the bunch.  It’s going to take some tough prodding to convince him.  Man, what excellent acting though.
Have you ever witnessed an argument amongst friends or colleagues and just plain enjoyed it?  Whether friendly or not, arguing can be very amusing and entertaining.  You wish, “Gee, why can’t I think that quick?”  This movie is for you. Essentially, it’s nothing but a bunch of old men arguing.  There are plenty of satisfactory shutdowns e.g. “I beg pardon…” “‘I beg pardon?’ What are you so polite about?”  “For the same reason you aren’t.  It’s the way I was brought up.”  or  “Anyone in his right mind would blow his stack.  He was just trying to bait me…”  “He did an excellent job.”  The dialogue is the best part. “You keep coming up with these great sayings!  Why don’t you send ‘em in to a paper – they pay three dollars apiece!”  Okay, I’m done quoting now.
There are four scenes in 12 Angry Men:  Outside the courthouse, the courtroom, the jury room, and the wash room.  That’s it.  And the first two hardly count.  It isn’t easy to pull off a full length feature film in one room but this doesn’t miss a beat.  You can feel their sweat, you sense their rising tempers and their growing fatigue.  The claustrophia settles in on the audience themselves.  I give Sidney Lumet a big gold star for directing, he knew how to set a mood.
This movie has aged well and remains influential to modern-day filmmaking.  Like I said, watch this if you enjoy a good debate. 10/10

Champagne (1928)

What is this: name that tune classical edition?  I heard some “Liebestraum,” some “Clair de Lune” … Beautiful stuff.   Too bad it does absolutely nothing for the story.  I was already very opinionated about the importance of music and sound to affect the mood of the film.  This film reiterates my position.  Without the usual musical cues, the mood gets lost in translation.  The march begins while the characters laugh in a bedroom.  It’s light and airy when she’s obviously depressed.  I never knew when to be happy or sad or worried.  So I usually just laughed.
Champagne is about a spoiled heiress Betty (Betty Balfour) (also the only character with a name) who uses her father’s (Gordon Harker) airplane to meet up with her lover (Jean Bradin) on a ship and run off together.  Though apparently she’s not supposed to do the marriage arrangements otherwise groom-to-be will get angry and lose the desire to get hitched.  Our fourth character is a mysterious man (Ferdinand von Alten) whom Betty had met while her boy was seasick and stuck in bed and revisits the scene many times throughout the movie.
The tables definitely turn when her disapproving father announces that he has lost their entire family fortune.  Betty attempts to sell all her jewelry only to be robbed in the process.  Totally broke, they have to rough it and unfortunately for the father, little Betty can’t cook well enough for a dog.  She ultimately finds work at a restaurant where she meets up with the mysterious man and boyfriend one last time…
Etc. I’m having a hard time writing this review because I was as far from interested as I could be.  Don’t get me wrong – I gave it my all, I sat through the entire thing and tried my best to appreciate what little I could.  My biggest irritant was by far the music, though I can’t really blame Hitchcock for that.  I’m sure he had no intention of placing nearly 50 classical pieces to play at random throughout his entire work.  I suppose there’s nothing terribly wrong for the story, just the pace.  The acting is fair.  The only thing commendable is innovative visual technique.
I really hope I don’t have to watch this again.  That’s all. 2/10

Shattered Glass (2003)

Warning: Your viewing experience can be absolutely exceptional if you watch knowing nothing about this film’s plot or the real events it depicts.  That is the best kind of movie watching and this film deserves that sort of attention.  Suffice it to say that this is a rewarding two hours and if you have not already seen it you should stop reading immediately and go rent this.  Right now.
At the dawn of the internet there’s The New Republic – referred to as the in-flight magazine of Air Force One.  Its youngest reporter, Stephen Glass (Hayden Christensen), is the man.  He always knows just what cards to play, what compliment to throw and what joke to tell to be loved, admired, and respected by everyone.  He’s charming, he’s witty, he’s unfallingly polite, and he’s on every other magazine’s hot list.
Chuck Lane (Peter Sarsgaard) is the new editor of the acclaimed magazine and he’s got it rough after replacing the beloved Michael Kelly (Hank Azaria).  When the news team of the online newspaper Forbes Digital brings to light potential discrepancies in Glass’s recent article “Hack Heaven”, Lane is faced with the gruelling challenge of getting to the bottom of it.  Sarsgaard received a Golden Globe nom for best supporting actor in this role and he is, indeed, phenomenal.  Scene after scene he hits it without a single misstep, though I am partial to a rather stirring moment near the end in which he coolly storms into the building wearing his black leather jacket, perfectly timed to Mychael Danna’s magnificent score.
The story is nothing short of fascinating.  Layer upon layer it sucks you into its web of possible lies and deceit.  It raises some important questions about journalistic ethics, though it may not answer the ultimate question of “what is driving this kid?”  It’s a complex character study with no real rhyme or reason to his actions because pathological liars don’t always have reasons.  It gets even better after it’s over and you can find out for yourself just how accurate the film’s events were, and more importantly how accurate Christensen’s performance was.  Say what you want about this kid and Star Wars, but he is excellent in Shattered Glass.  You may argue that he’s just as whiny as ever but this time it fits his character.  Or perhaps you think he’s finally found his niche.  Either way, he’s great – so I wouldn’t give up on him just yet.  Featured on our DVD copy is the “60 Minutes” interview with the real Stephen Glass and after watching that I can safely say that Darth Vader hit it right on the mark.
Other notable performances go to Hank Azaria, Chloe Sevigny, Rosario Dawson, and Steve Zahn in his small role (I could watch that guy in anything).  The acting isn’t the film’s only strength, though.  First time director Billy Ray creates a riveting drama that captivates its audience better than any other movie I’ve seen in years.  It deserves a place right next to All the President’s Men as the greatest journalism movies ever made with a perfect, witty script and a satisfying end to boot.
I could watch this movie a thousand times, it’s that sharp. 10/10
“If it was sunny outside and Steve and I were both standing outside in the sun and Steve came to me and said, ‘It’s a sunny day,’ I would immediately go check with two other people to make sure it was a sunny day.” ~Chuck Lane on Stephen Glass

Blackmail (1929)

It took me fifteen minutes to figure out what the hell was going on… but once I finally found my whereabouts I was pleasantly surprised.  It began (both the film itself and production) as a silent but was later changed into a sound feature film, one of the very first British talkies.  (It was later released as a complete silent, something I have yet to see).  Blackmail is based on the play by Charles Bennett of the same title and the plot is just that.  Blackmail.  Starring the ever enchanting and delightful Anny Ondra as well as John Longden, Blackmail starts cooking when Alice White (Ondra) ditches her boyfriend detective Frank Webber (Longden) for a date with a Mr. Crewe (Cyril Ritchard), an artist she had agreed to meet.  Their “meeting” takes them to Mr. Crewe’s private studio where Alice naively flirts the night away, unaware for much too long of Mr. Crewe’s obviously lewd intentions.  Unaware, that is, until he attempts to take advantage of her and she stabs him to death.
The following day Frank is assigned to investigate the mysterious murder case.  He immediately discovers Alice’s connection after finding her glove in the studio.  He, unfortunately, is not the only one who knows of Alice’s involvement.  Local thief Tracey (Donald Calthrop), who had seen her with Mr. Crewe the previous evening, comes to confront Alice and Frank at her father’s shop in attempts to, you guessed it, blackmail them.  The film concludes with a surprisingly intense chase-scene and a satisfying end.
Chronologically speaking this is my “first” favorite.  For a film made in 1929, I was genuinely invested, genuinely frightened for our leading lady, and genuinely intrigued by its plot.  One scene in particular stands out to me.  After Alice has returned from her rather horrifying evening, she’s sitting at the kitchen table with her parents.  Another woman in the room is commenting on the murderer’s choice of a knife, and each time the word is uttered Alice’s eyes get a little wider.  The word is emphasized to the point that you can practically see it typed in bold-face on the screen.  Soon all we (and Alice) hear is “knife… Knife, KNIFE…” until she drops a knife onto the table.  It’s so perfectly tense.
I think the thing I’m most impressed with is how gripping the story is.  Many other films of this time period are far from that (The Farmer’s Wife for one).  And, I mean, if we’re comparing this to something like Speed of course it isn’t similarly jam-packed with action.  Nevertheless, from beginning to end it moves quickly and captures your attention.
Though stunted by awkward lip-syncing (talkies were too new to dub over in post production, and her Czech accent was too thick to suit), I am delighted with Anny Ondra.  She’s as cute as they come, I also enjoyed her in The Manxman.
Overall, Blackmail is a well-made early talkie, worthwhile to any film historian or movie lover and essential to a Hitchophile. Hitch-storian? Hitchmaniac? We'll work on that later. Anyway, the beginning is misleading, but stick with it for fifteen minutes.  It picks up.  7/10
p.s. Hitchcock’s trademark cameo in this is a new personal fave.

Prince of Persia (2010)

The story goes something like this: Dastan (Jake Gyllenhaal) is an Aladdin-like street urchin who, after a random act of courage, finds himself as the newly adopted son of the king of Persia (Ronald Pickup).  Fifteen years later, after he and his foster brothers Garsiv (Toby Kebbell) and Tus (Richard Coyle) attack the neighboring city of Alamut where Princess Tamina (Gemma Arterton) reigns, Dastan is wrongly accused of murdering the king and turns fugitive.  The rest of the movie depicts his adventures in the sand (and through time) with his new princess travelling companion, Tamina and the mysterious nature of the dagger he now possesses.
I went into this movie with extremely low expectations but exiting the theater, I can’t quite say that it’s bad!  Compared to other video games to film?  Yeah, it isn’t that horrible.  In fact for once its video game qualities were the reasons to SEE it, not the reasons to AVOID it.  Mike Newell’s (HP and the Goblet of Fire) direction manages to pull everything together in a satisfactory manner that is better than your average VG flick.  The script is blah, the acting is meh, – but it isn’t rotten.  Jake Gyllenhaal was yummy as the impossibly buff protagonist, and the video game sequences were stylish and entertaining.  The plot was surprisingly original, well paced and full of lots of fun stuntwork.  I had a good time, no joke.  I’m not sure if I was more entertained by the film or the audience I was with – all of whom were at the edge of their seats with anticipation laughing, screaming, gasping, the whole works – but either way it was a pleasant and enjoyable two hours.  Beware the notable eye-liner infestation on our leading lady and none other than Sir Kingsley.  I’ll probably never see it again but I don’t regret having seen it once.  I’d give a solid 8/10 for entertainment value but when considering all factors I’ll give it a 5/10 overall score.
And heck, it’s gotta be better than The Last Airbender!  Or so I’m told.

Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace (1999)

So I think it’s about time I did a Star Wars marathon review-fest.  To start off: I. Am. A. Star. Wars. Nut.  I grew up watching the original trilogy and they still remain some of my all-time favorite movies.  Another thing you should know: I am not a prequel-hater.  I prefer the original trilogy, yes. Definitely yes. But I think George Lucas gets a lot of crap thrown at him for prequels that really aren’t that terrible.  There are many things to like.  Sure there are bad aspects which I will discuss in my reviews, but so do a lot of good movies.  The original movies are classic, with the perfect blend of character, action, a wicked plot, and heart.  The prequels are just good movies.
So on to The Phantom Menace

This takes place about 30 years before A New Hope (or if you want me to get really nerdy.. that’d be 30 years BBY – Before Battle of Yavin).  Two jedis, Qui Gon Jinn (Liam Neeson) and Obi Wan Kenobi (Ewan McGregor) are sent to settle a dispute between the Trade Federation and the planet of Naboo.  When things go sour, they narrowly escape and set off to warn Queen Amidala but the Federation are already starting to take over.  While helping to protect the Queen they land on the planet Tatooine where Qui Gon and the Queen’s handmaiden, Padme (Natalie Portman) meet young Anakin Skywalker (Jake Lloyd) who helps them get parts to repair their ship.  He ultimately joins them on their way to Coruscant, where they hope to settle their issues once and for all.
I have such a clear recollection of going to see this in the theater.  I was just 9-years-old but I still knew the Star Wars universe backwards and forwards.  In the opening scenes, I still remember the excitement I felt at hearing the older jedi with the long ‘do speak the name of “Obi Wan” to the younger jedi with the funny pony tail.  Yes!  Obi Wan!  I had no idea what the plot was going to be about at the time, so I felt a certain security early on to find a favorite character on board.
Many, many viewings later I still get a kick out of it.  Though with that I now notice different things. Like corny dialogue.  Yeah, okay.  I’ll try not to repeat this several times so let’s just consider it understood that the script is not, how shall I put it, its strongest point.  Yeah, I get it. Let's just move on from it, okay? SO WHAT. Luckily we get some early lightsaber action to move it along to better things.
Oh sorry, did I say better things?  Excuse my hastiness.  The better things will have to wait until we get this big walking mistake out of the way.  Jar-Jar Binks (Ahmed Best) is the WORST thing to ever happen to the Star Wars franchise.  Worse than corny dialogue.  Worse than Hayden Christensen and Jake Lloyd put together.  As Qui Gon put it, “The ability to speak does not make you intelligent.”  Jar-Jar should have just bolted at that insult then and there to spare us from his obscene presence.  Though his real opportunity to be written off came just a scene later – by allowing him to receive the “pune-ishment” he deserves.  But no.  He’s got himself a “life debt” with Qui Gon.  Really Qui Gon?  Do you NEED to hold this Gungan just because you saved his life?  Do you really expect him to help you out in return? I’m pretty sure you can save your own skin a lot better.  *Sigh*  I’m pretty sure that Jar-Jar is the one thing that everyone can reach an agreement on.  Terrible.  I mean doesn’t George Lucas know that “ex-quueeze me” is from Full House of all things?  Shutting up now.
Side note: Would you get a hold of the Queen’s wardrobe?  Holy I’ve never seen anything so big and extravagant.  It’s also fun to see some small Keira Knightley action in there too, even if she is covered in white makeup and feathers.


Now to the better things.  Better thing number 1: The Nubian cruiser.  It’s pretty slick, ain’t it?  I mean, nothing rivals the Falcon but this beast is pretty!  Better thing number 2: R2-D2 is still kicking trash, just look at how he outlasted every single other droid to save the ship.  Man, he rocks.
Tatooine is still as ugly as ever.  I also remember going “Hey!  That’s Luke’s dad!  Darth Vader!”  And again, things are so much better when you’re nine.  Jake Lloyd may be a cute kid but he’s not terribly talented.  Frankly though, I don’t mind him.  At least he had some spirit – which is more than you could say for Hayden Christensen.  I think he was a good symbol of innocence.  It was like, how could he turn evil, ya know?
Better thing number 3: C-3PO (albeit a naked C-3PO).  The dynamic droid duo is (almost) reunited once more!
Better thing number 4: The podrace.  This is the first highlight of the movie.  From the announcing of the contestants to the explosions, Tuskan raider chants, and familiar Jawa jabber – this is nothing but intense and entertaining film watching.  I can’t say it’s better than Ben Hur‘s chariot race (though it is uncannily similar) but this is still awesome.  A little long, perhaps.  But awesome.
From then on out we get some more lightsaber action with Darth Maul (Ray Park), an introduction to then Senator Palpatine (Ian McDiarmid) with an oddly familiar voice, some political intrigue, and best of all the introduction to the jedi council.  Yoda (Frank Oz), and Mace Windu (what’s this – Samuel L. Jackson in a Star Wars movie??) are two other excellent factors to the prequel trilogy.  I had an Episode I Encyclopedia and I loved learning about all of the different jedis on the council.  Don't judge me!
Better (and final) thing number 5: The jedi-battle with Darth Maul.  Being a martial artist myself I delight in watching Ray Parker.  This is the best part of the movie, and one of the best moments in the entire series.  It’s excellently choreographed and perfectly set to John Williams’ “Duel of the Fates.”  What a sick battle, and where can I get me a double sided lightsaber?  It’s too bad Obi Wan had to finish Maul off because we could have used his awesomeness in a few more movies.
Other notes… Acting: This is Natalie Portman’s worst of the trilogy.  I actually really like her as an actress, but she was really wooden this time around.  I do think that Ewan McGregor was an excellent choice for a young Ben Kenobi, or rather a young Alec Guiness.  He too improves in the subsequent movies but he’s pretty good in this one.  Liam Neeson isn’t bad either.  As I mentioned earlier Jake Lloyd may not have been the ideal choice but he isn’t terrible, IMO.
The special effects, scenery, and plot are all great.  We already knew that Anakin Skywalker was once good but here we learn that he had a destiny to fulfill.  He was “the chosen one.”  He was supposed to bring balance to the force.  The story is great, it’s a shame the script didn’t match up.
All in all I think it’s a good introduction to the saga setting up better things to come.  I actually enjoyed it a lot better than the last time I watched it, though it still remains my least favorite of the six.  It doesn’t have the same heart of the original trilogy but it’s still a good, enjoyable movie.  6/10



Family Plot (1976)

So there are worse movies that director Alfred Hitchcock could end his career on.  Family Plot is no Psycho, but it’s entertaining.
We’ve got two plot lines goin’ on: 1) A phony psychic/spiritualist lady, Madame Blanche Tyler (Barbara Harris), and her boyfriend George Lumley (Bruce Dern) are our main duo.  After a séance with an elderly millionaire, she offers Madame Blanche $10,000 to find a certain Edward Shoebridge, her long-lost nephew.
2) Eddie Shoebridge!  Or rather, Arthur Adamson (William Devane) and his girlfriend Fran (Karen Black).  They’re the kidnappin’, jewel-collecting, wanted couple. It starts getting interesting when the two paths begin to intersect through George’s investigation of the mysterious (and seemingly dead) Shoebridge.
From an historical standpoint, this movie is very interesting.  Hitchcock has created something with a much more modern edge when comparing it with his earlier classics – I’d go so far as to say that it doesn’t age as well.  The expletives give it a real 70′s feel though they still seem rather risque for Hitch and dare I say out of place.
There’s gotta be a word for this movie, and the word that comes to mind is… kooky.  Kooky characters, kooky grave yards, kooky plot, kooky psychics, kooky car chases… it’s just kooky!  But that isn’t a bad thing,  it still has many Hitchcockian qualities that raise it a level above mediocre.  There are some well crafted scenes, my favorite being the garage scene at the end though man, did you get a hold of that car chase?  It’s a lighthearted mystery much like his The Trouble With Harry.  If you’re a die hard Hitchcock fan, you should definitely see this.  I may even like it better than something like Foreign Correspondent and it’s definitely better than Topaz.  If you like plain ol’ 70′s movies, you might enjoy it as well.  If you don’t fall into either of these categories… I recommend this with reserves.
But really, it’s a riot.   A fine and satisfactory end to a magnificent career. 6/10

On the Waterfront (1954)

“You don’t understand, I coulda had class!  I coulda been a contender, I coulda been somebody, instead of a bum, which is what I am.”
Everyone’s heard this quote before.  Everyone.  It’s been torn apart and parodied endlessly, and much of its magic has been lost by over use.  This scene, however, between Charlie and Terry Malloy is magical.  It’s one of the most finely crafted scenes in all the movies.  Everyone also knows that Marlon Brando is an excellent actor but he is not just an actor.  He was a person, a creator, an artist.  His spontaneity and sincerity are so genuine and truly unique for the time.  This scene (and movie) proves just why he is one the greatest actors to ever grace the screen.
On the Waterfront is one of “those movies.”  Like Casablanca, The Godfather, or Gone with the Wind… it’s a critically acclaimed classic that everyone “should” see.  Blah blah blah.  My initial thought was more like, “Okay, let’s get this over with so I can say I’ve seen it” which is really how many treat classic movies.  But is it REALLY worth it?  The answer is yes, yes, yes!
I love On the Waterfront because when I’m watching I am somewhere else.  Even though it’s nearly 60-years-old it still feels fresh.  I turn off the TV and I lean back and think to myself “wow, that was a good story” and then I want to tell everyone about my experience.  It’s a very emotional story, beginning with a death only 5 minutes in.  Terry Malloy (Brando) plays an ex-fighter who now tends pigeons and runs errands for big-bad Johnny Friendly (Lee J. Cobb).  After receiving a subpoena, he is faced with the choice of whether or not to stand up to his union bosses.  It’s a story about hope, fear, redemption, love, dissapointment, anger, and courage.
This movie is my precious gem.  It’s a film that most people from my generation have (sadly) never seen but anyone over 40 has seen it 10 to 30 times.  I love when people ask me what my favorite movie is and I respond “On the Waterfront” and they go, “Ohh yeah… I think I’ve heard of that one, yeah.”  (I’m speaking to kids my age, here.  If you are a fellow movie blogger, yeah I know.  You’ve most likely seen this movie).  But anyway, if I have no other cinematic influence on my friends I hope that I can share this must-see classic with them.  I’ve loved Star Wars and other movies since birth but this was the film that really opened my eyes to the possibilities of an actor, and to all that a classic movie could offer to a kid.  You could say it turned me from a movie goer to a true movie lover; turned movies from sheer entertainment to pieces of art.
Terry Malloy is a hero.  Think about the scene where Terry decides to tell Edie (Eva Marie Saint) that it was he who set her brother up to be killed (albeit unknowingly).  9/10 rom coms/drams today would have done it differently.  Edie would have found out in some way that didn’t disclose the entire story painting Terry in a bad light, hate him for being dishonest and then somehow make-up because she was overreacting.  Kiss and all is better.  What I love here is his complete honesty.  He knew, with the help of Father Barry (Karl Malden), that he needed to tell her.  He knew that she needed to know.  So what does he do?  He runs immediately down the hill and he tells her the truth!  This is not famous like the contender scene or the end but it is beautiful.  We hear no dialogue, just the train speeding by echoing the screaming in Edie’s head.  She’s upset (duhh), then runs away in horror and Terry’s left standing there alone and hurt.  It is the epitome of consequences for our actions, even unknowing actions.
Each and every character is excellent, and the acting superb.  Terry is a hero.  Edie is kind and loyal.  Their relationship is one of the best in cinema, they are definitely in my top best screen couples.  Father Coogan is faithful and serviceable: “If you think Christ is not on the Waterfront…” Johnny Friendly is a powerful, angry pawn.  Charlie (Rod Steiger) is a good brother, it’s just that no one knew it yet.
Elia Kazan gives us exactly what he wanted.  Loosely based off his own experience, he paints a picture of what it’s like to stand up.  His directing decisions create something wonderful.  I must also credit Leonard Bernstein’s score – the music is moving and perfectly set.  It’s odd that I rarely compliment the musical score in my reviews since I truly believe that music and sound is absolutely essential to the tone and theme of the movie.  Leonard Bernstein is a master and this film wouldn’t be the same without his emotional contribution.
On the Waterfront is just another story, just another movie.  But this movie changed me.  10/10